Tigriske

This year is not starting out well.

Over the weekend, my 17.5 year old cat, Tigris (pic 2 and 3), took a turn for the worse. For the past year, she has been gradually losing weight, though she still has had her ferocious appetite. And, I think she has been deaf for the past few months. (I would walk in the house, and yell her name while she was asleep, but no response. Only when I would tap her on the back would she look up and realize I was there. Normally, she would greet me at the door, possibly knowing the sound of my car door closing…)

Over the weekend, she visibly deterorated. Her gait has become wobbly, to say the least. She has barely eaten anything, drinks a lot, and has been unable to jump up onto my bed. She also has had several litter box accidents; she even peed in her own bed.

So, today, I took her to the vet. She has not been for over 12-15 years. Bad, I know. But since she has always been an indoor cat, I (we) didn’t see the real need.

For the better part of the weekend, I have been trying to prepare myself for the inevitable. It was only when I saw her face while I was taking her out of the back seat of my car did I realize I could not do this.

Upon listing her symptoms to the vet, and his own examination of her, he concluded that she has ulcers in her mouth, and possibly in her stomach, hyperthyroidism, and possible, yet mild, kidney failure. Not good.

He told me that the hyperthyroidism is treatable in three ways. The first being with pills, the second I forget, and the third with surgery. My cat, though, in her current state, is too weak to do the second and the third. It will also be very costly. The blood work will be $130 alone. She would also need to be kept overnight, given the pills, and have an IV, and that’s all prior to the surgery. The vet was very frank with me. He told me that a few days earlier and cat – a little worse off than mine – came in. The owner decided to go forward with the treatment for the hyperthyroidism; unfortunately, the cat died within two days at the vet. That is something I do not want. If Tigris is going to die, I want her to go peacefully at home or in my arms at the vet – not isolated in a cold metal cage.

I decided to do nothing and weight it out. The vet did however insert liquids underneath her skin, gave me food to give her that is designed for cats with kidney issues, and gave me pills to give her twice a day for I forget what. Nausea? I dunno.

When I told the vet that I think it would be best for me to take her home, he agreed with my decision. Then, in a somewhat soothing tone, he began to say things like “I can see you treated her well” and “she had a full life.” I almost lost it. Water welled up in my eyes and I could barely speak. It took a lot for me to not start crying on the spot. That’s when he told me he was going to take her in the back and give her fluids. This single visit cost $106.

I asked him early on whether she was in pain. I suppose I thought that if he could tell me, without doubt, that she was clearly in pain, it would ease my decision to put her down. But, instead, he said that he does not think she’s in pain as I was defining it. He told me that he defines pain as placing his hand on a hot stove. So, she does not have pain like that. The kind of “pain” that she may have is like sitting at home with a fever and feeling achy.

Tigris now is at home in her bed. The food the vet gave me is right in front of her, as is a spare litter box. If she is going to die, at least she will be at home.

Labels: animals, life, Tigris